While it is true that "No one expects the SCP Inquisition!", that is only because there is no such point.

You are watching: Things dr bright is not allowed to do

Tbelow is no market for SCP brand also pornography. 1.No, not also in Germany kind of.

Victims of SCP-217 are not playthings. 1.Nor are they to be offered as props at a Steampunk Convention.

. Not also for recreational use.

Not permitted to sfinish Nigerian-esque spam email to the Church of the Broken God.

Not enabled to end reports via lyrics from "The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air". 1.But is enabled to end with lyrics from the Safety Dance. 2.The interpretive dance routine, but, is forbidden till he gets lessons for the foreseeable future.

Dr. Bbest is NOT: A superhero of any type, Head of Public Relations, in charge of Orientation for new staff, a medical professional of psychology, a member of Site Command, made out of bacon, in possession of a IQ over 300, Head of SCP Recheck out, or a member of Maintenance Staff. (Sorry boys, Dr. Bright IS a member of Site Command. It's usually finest not to ask why. It's O5 Command you're reasoning of.)

No longer permitted to consist of jodies for morning calisthenics. 1.Yes, this includes The Micvital Mouse Club song.

Dr. Bappropriate is not allowed to use SCP-963 to any kind of major political figures. Aget.

Dr. Bright is not from an alternate timeline. 1.Dr. Bideal cannot worry orders to "keep the timeline". 2.Or to "corrupt the timeline". 3.Or to "screw via those background nerds".

1.Chainsaws are not the solution to eincredibly question.1.Nor is 'More Chainsaws'.2.Or "Chainexperienced cannons"1.Except for that once. And yes, it was awesome.SCP rate dating never happened. Any one that clintends to remember such an event should report to Site Command also for administration of Class A amnesiac.

Nothing in the Foundation is rated 'Over 9000.'

"My evil twin did it" is no longer thought about a viable excusage. 1.Nor is "My great twin did it," considering the implications.

Yes, forum trolls are annoying. No, they don't automatically become D-class personnel.

The "Ultimate Showdvery own of Ultimate Destiny" is not grounds to pit more than fifteenager combative SCPs, consisting of SCP-682 and Able, against each various other. 1."Weeding out some of these angsty teens with mindset difficulties," but, is. 2.Dr. Bright is not permitted to administer 'Free Hugs.'

The Foundation motto is "Secure, Contain, Protect", not any type of of the following: 1."Stab Carrion Powerfully" 2."Let's usage it on 682!" 3."Throw the cheese!" 4."That's it, you're on Keter Duty." 5."Can we put it in 914?" 6."Blood provides the grass grow, kill, kill, kill!" 7."Fuck trees, I climb clouds motherfucker!" 8."Someone is getting stabbed." 1.But some days, it have to be. 9."Whose hand is that?" 10."If all else stops working, poop on it." 11."If all else falls short, there's always the sun." 12."We need bigger kit10s." 13."Society of Creepy Perverts." 14."Fuck Death, War, Famine and also Pestilence. We've got Clef, Gears, Kondraki and also Bappropriate." 15."Throw D-Class at it until it stops." 16."447 and also dead bodies, two great tastes that taste great together." 17."The FBI are a bunch of pansies." 18."Who desires to watch what I deserve to make the president carry out in public?" 19."For the Horde!" 20."Science for the Science God!" 21."Make sure to wipe your feet on 2558!" 22."When in doubt, feed it to 682." 23."Slapstick, Clowns and also Puns" 24."Drop the blanket now!" 25."Seduction, Coitus, and also Pregnancy" 26."We always need even more Dakka!" 27."Still Alive, and Found the Cake" 28."Don't Worry, O5 won't ever before figure it out!" 29."Will it blend?" 30."Commies love us!" 31."Snap Crackle and Pop"

Dr. Bright is no much longer permitted to market the solution of "Use more guns" to any type of trouble. 1.Or "Get bigger weapons."

In spite of what he may say and any evidence, no matter how plausible, the SCP Foundation has never before and also will never before be associated with Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and also Wizardry, and also regardmuch less of what Dr. Bbest may say, he is not, and I quote, "A actual life wizarding tutor." 1.Nor is he a vampire. That was body glitter and bad acting. 2.And despite what the computer system file on him may say, he is not Muad'dib. The spice have the right to circulation just fine without him.

Cthulhu and R'lyeh are not valid factors to sfinish Pandora's Box out right into the Pacific Ocean in order to capture them. In addition, these are not also SCPs, and I will certainly find the perchild who decided to enter a database file for them.

Dr. Bright is not allowed to uppack visual memetic kill agents to 4chan 7chan any kind of imageboard. 1.Well, okay, possibly to 4chan. It'd be doing the gene pool a service.

Dr. Bappropriate is no much longer allowed to accept or usage the complying with as payment for bets: 1.Your spirit 2.Anyone else's heart 3.Virgin's blood 4.Reproductive organs 5.SCPs 6.Memories (genuine or imagined) 7.Pieces of your previous I have no principle how that worked via Clef, but reportedly he can execute it. 8.The island also of Manhattan 9.Beads 10.Firstborn kids 11.Second-born youngsters 12.Red-headed stepkids 13.Rented mules 14.Gold spun from straw 15.A child's laughter 16.A child's tears 17.Virginity 18.Ponies 19.Anyone's grandmommy 20.Anyone's grandpa 21.Anyone's sister 22.Any blood relative

Dr. Bideal is not enabled to acquire on the PA device at website 19 and also announce that he simply won The Game You know what, Dr. Bright is simply never permitted on the PA device for any kind of factor, ever before.

Dr. Bappropriate is not permitted to dare brand-new personnel anyone to play 'peek-a-boo' via either SCP-569 or SCP-173.

When ordering things virtual, sfinish them to PO Box ████ and also not straight to Site 19. We've currently had actually three postguys present up at the front door. (How did they even find us?) Dr. Bright is not to offer directions to Site 19 to non-Foundation personnel.

The SCP Foundation does not have actually any kind of such position as "Chief Defenestrator". 1.Wrong. 1.Agent Clef is not permitted to produce new positions.

Dr. Bbest is not permitted to use SCP-914 to craft items from Team Fortress 2. 1.Yes, a Medigun would be a advantageous tool for the Foundation clinical staff. No, we are not going to waste any kind of more SCP-500 attempting to make one, especially not after SCP-427. 2.Dr. Bright is not enabled to use SCP-914 to craft items from Minecraft, either. Also, your "Diamond Pickaxe" has been confiscated.

Dr. Bappropriate possesses the ability of consciousness deliver and also the artireality SCP-963. He does not possess any type of of the following: 1."laser" eyes. 2."laser" nostrils. 3."laser" . 4.a Environment-friendly Red ANY Lantern Ring. 5.an "adamantium" skeleton. 6.Anduril. 7.Mjolnir. 8.a map resulting in "ALL OF THE NAZI GOLD". 9.the "Ancient" medallion. 10.a copy of the Necronomsymbol. 1.A King James version of the Necronomicon. 11.cybernetic implants of any type of kind. 12.the "Dragonzord". I don't treatment how you did it, put it BACK. 13.the 7th Element of Harmony. 14.infallible "gaydar". 15.infallible "jewdar". 16.the touch. 17.the power. 18.the "secret" 19.telepathy. 20.telekinesis. 21.the original filming model of any type of fictional spacecraft. 22.1337 H4x00r sKi11z. 23.the 6th feeling. 24.The capability to identify in between butter and I Can't Believe It's Not Butter.

SCP-963 is not a 'spirit gem', and also making a contract with Dr. Bright will not revolve you into a 'magical girl'. 1.Not also if he has a 'magical girl outfit'.

SCP-963 is not the Soul Gem. Bright does not have actually access to the Infinity Gauntlet. Please speak glaring at civilization who annoy you and snapping.

Copies of SCP-1981 are not to be submitted to "America's Funniest Home Videos". 1.Or posted on YouTube. 2.Or on YouPorn. 3.Or to Tosh.0.

The adhering to are not appropriate resources for D-course personnel: 1.Temp agencies. 2.Craigslist. 3.Reality display talent pools. 4.Jerry Springer tapings. 5."Orphans." 6."Urchins." 7."Ragamuffins." 8."Those sons of bitches who scratched up my paint project at the car wash." 9.Ex-girlfriends. 10.Ex-boyfriends. 11.Ex-partners of any type of sex variation whatsoever. 12.Staff members' in-regulations. 13.Youtube comment threads. 14.Forum trolls. 15.Angsty teenagers. 16.Bad applications to the SCP Foundation. Two exceptions have been made, but the rest are off borders. 17.Occupy Wall Street. 18.The Tea Party. 19.The Green Party. 20.The "Green" Party. 21.The Gathering of the Juggalos. 1.How the fuck execute they work?

The adhering to items are not SCPs: 1.Rainbows. 2.Double rainbows. 3."Rainbooms", whether sonic or otherwise. 4.The tides. 5.The Moon. 6."Fucking magnets". 7.Rocks that skip 3 times prior to they go underwater. 8.Soy cheese. 9.Hippies. 10.Hipsters. 11."MILFs." 12."G-MILFs." 13."GG-MILFs." 14."Actually funny SNL skits" As these do not exist, they cannot be SCPs. 15.Anyone's breasts. 16.People who can solve Rubik's Cubes (of any type of size). 17.Shiny Any Pokemon.

Dr. Bappropriate is not enabled to test internet "Creepypasta" rites making use of Class-D personal.

"Yo mama" is not "so ugly SCP-096 didn't look at her."

SCP-173 is not a babysitter. Having SCP-173 play 'Where's the baby?' is downideal cruel. Not, as Dr. Bbest clintends, ' hilarious.'

Playing the song "Thriller" in the presence of SCP-008 victims is specifically forbidden. 1.Letting out SCP-008 victims and also punching them "to simulate Minecraft" is also forbidden. 2.Pushing a number of agents in front of SCP-008 victims "to simulate Resident Evil" is not a valid excuse, either. 3.Dr. Bappropriate is no longer allowed near victims of SCP-008.

Even if Dr. Bbest is wearing an eyepatch, he is not permitted to "Keel-Haul" anyone. 1.Not also on "Talk Like a Pirate Day". 2.Talk Like a Pirate Day is not enabled to be celebrated at Site ██. Any personnel violating this rule will walk the plank be severely disciplined. 3.Tright here is no such thing as "Talk Like a Ninja" day, and Dr. Bbest is not permitted to develop it.

Dr. Bbest is not allowed to play "SCP Roulette" through SCP-173, a light switch and any kind of combination of D-class and also brand-new personnel.

Dr. Bbest is not permitted to "go on crusade". 1.Or on "jihad". 2.Dr. Bright is not permitted to concern fatwas against anyone or anything.

Dr. Bappropriate is no much longer permitted to declare "After ten thousand also years I'm free! It's time to conquer Earth!" upon assuming a brand-new hold.

Dr. Bright is not, nor has he ever before been, the "Undiscussed SCP Intercontinental Champion".

Dr. Bbest is no longer permitted to run via Site 19 any type of site while screaming "THE KETER IS LOOSE" unless it's an actual emergency. 1.Claiming it's for research on the results of social design is not an emergency. 2.Nor is making use of it to clear out the areas Dr. Bright is otherwise limited from entering as a result of factors given on this list. 3.Dr. Bideal might not begin referring to any type of persons or SCPs as "The Keter" in order to circumvent these rules, unless they are actually classified as Keter.

Dr. Bbest is no much longer permitted to usage the words "swag" , "swag it", "swagginator", "swaggify", or "super swag" to specify himself or any kind of other person(s).

Dr. Bbest is not allowed to sheight in a voice resembling a movie character. 1.Dr. Bright is not permitted to reenact any type of movie. Even G-rated ones? Even G-rated ones.

Dr. Bbest is no longer enabled to say "Everything the Bappropriate touches is our kingdom"

Dr. Bbest may not urge bereaved staff members to "look at the Bright side". 1.Nor is he permitted to describe any name-connected puns as " Bright ideas". 2.Dr. Bright is not enabled to describe any kind of SCPs, Foundation resources, or personnel as his "intricate dancing pants".

Dr. Bright is no much longer permitted to commit "Seppuku." 1.Even if he has an audience. 2.Especially a captive one.

Dr. Bright is no longer allowed to commission, develop, advertise, or display screen animated videos to containment staff anyone through the subject, "What Happens When You Fuck Up Containing SCP (insert SCP here)" 1.NO, it is NOT educational, Bideal. Not the method you show it.

Dr. Bideal is not allowed to produce a "The Things Dr Bappropriate Is Allowed To Do At The Foundation" list by listing whatever that isn't on this list. Just because it isn't on this list doesn't suppose you must perform it. 1.He may but repursuit for one to be created. 2.He may not, yet, suggest what must be on shelp list.

Dr. Bbest may not describe anyone as a "peasant."

Dr. Bappropriate is not allowed to arselection gladiatorial arena combat between D-course, even ESPECIALLY if any SCPs are used as weapons.

SCP-173 does not "simply desire a hug" and also Dr. Bbest might not attempt to convince anyone otherwise.

Dr. Bbest is not enabled to strike instances of SCP-217 claiming that "the Borg have attacked".

Dr. Bideal is not allowed to begin any kind of drag races in between D-classes in cars and also SCP-096.

Dr. Bappropriate is not permitted to yell out "Immigration!" near any type of foreign personnel.

Doctor Bideal is not allowed to convince brand-new personnel ANYONE to "have actually a friendly staring contest via SCP-096."

Dr. Bideal is not allowed to sfinish a Slinky down SCP-087.

Dr. Bideal is not allowed to insurance claim that Researcher Zyn Kiryu is the brand-new "Master of Butterflies" as a result of her considerable work on butterfly-associated SCP items. 1."King of the Booterflies" is not an inheritable title. No, not even if Kondraki really is dead, which, if true, Dr. Bright isn't cleared to understand. 2.Researcher Zyn Kiryu is likewise not to be referred to by Dr. Bbest as "Queen of the Butterflies", "Mistress and anxiety of the Butterflies", "Supreme Princess of the Butterflies", "Great Shepherd of the Butterflies", "Second Cousin of the Butterflies", or "Major Associate of the Butterflies," or any kind of other grandiose title referring to butterflies.

Dr. Bappropriate is not enabled to tell new Foundation recruits fictional horror stories involving his family.

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Dr. Bappropriate is not allowed to tell brand-new Foundation recruits factual horror stories involving his household.

Okay, that thought it was an excellent principle to let him have a tiktok account to review off all of these?